WEST LAFAYETTE, Indiana — Today I attended the Bat Mitzvah of a friend and found the ceremony truly moving. As you probably know, the Bat Mizvah is the ceremony that recognizes the arrival of the young person into religious obligation and adulthood — which means she is welcomed into the community, participates in the Shabbat service, and becomes responsible for her own decisions.
My friend, S, is a 12-year-old American [turning 13 on Monday] but I met her family when I lived in Northern Ireland. S's mom and I were co-workers and her family really looked after me and included me many fun things. They still live in Belfast and it was much easier to part from them a month ago, knowing that I would see them here in Indiana for this wonderful event.
S read two passages from the Torah and also delivered a d'var Torah, what we might call a homily or essay about her insights or lessons from the reading. I was so proud of S, who worked mightily on these pieces of the service. There are not many Jewish people in Belfast, and she worked with tutors to learn not only the Hebrew texts but also to understand the society, context and larger philosophy to help her form her point of view for the d'var Torah.
The service included all of her family, and the most moving part was the physical handing down of the Torah from generation to generation. Then S, holding the Torah, and her family walked around the synagogue while members of the congregation held out their prayer books to touch the scrolls.*
The readings, the prayers and what I would call the liturgy are strongly similar to elements of our own Christian service. The focus is on praising and thanking God, honoring our elders and parents, observing the Sabbath, and acting with integrity to our fellow human beings and the earth. Throughout the service I was thinking of how much we have in common between our two cultures, and how we are linked by basic precepts and tenets of faith. What a journey S has had in her religious and geographic life! And how many cultures has she interacted with, in her own country and in NI!
To conclude S's spotlight portion of the service, her mom and dad gave short speeches about what the day and what S mean to them. S's mom and I have always enjoyed speaking Norn Iron, and even through my tears, I had to laugh when she concluded her remarks by telling her daughter, "Dad and I are proud of you. So we are."
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* At this point I was bawling like a baby. Recently I have become strangely emotional — crying about good things. I carry Kleenex with me wherever I go.
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