the great frame-up

A house isn't really home for me until all the artwork is up on the walls. I have a lot of artwork, some of which has never been framed nor shown in my private gallery (aka the hall). And so it was that I trundled off to the mega-craft store to buy some frames, because getting them custom done is just darn pricey.

Mapgirl Dark Secret #79: I am not good at selecting /assembling / doing anything with frames that does not involve getting them custom done.

I was having a silent meltdown in the store when the professional framer came to my aid. She had flaming red hair and all kinds of piercings and some serious eyeliner and is incredibly good at what she does.

Standing next to her, a resplendent quetzal, I felt like a plain brown wren. Here's the truth: I have no style.

Fortunately for me, she does. She tossed out all the yellow mats around my souvenir-quality photos, recommended some affordable customer mats for my professional-quality photo, and utterly charmed me. In advising me on mats, she asked what color the walls in the house are … and I used my cell phone to show her pictures of my peachy / pumpkiny / sunflowery walls. She immediately switched out some frames and mats and made all the artwork look amazing.

"So you know exactly where you'll hang all of these?" she asked as we surveyed all that art. I laughed out loud.

"Not a clue," I confessed. I told her that I was terrified to break from the minimalist tradition of the house's previous owners. I don't want to violate any of my virginal sherbet walls, where no nail has ever penetrated.

My Nashville pals have given me good recommendations on this topic, and I hope to have everything in place before my holiday open house on 6 December. But my personal framing expert recommended I hold off framing my largest piece — a custom one — until this week. Sixty percent off!

I went back tonight to drop off the piece: a giant map of downtown Belfast City Centre that I bought on my last Saturday there. It is circa 1965, pre-Troubles, and I love to look at it and revisit every entry and mew. I bought it at a Linen Hall Library sale, and the cost of framing is 10 times what I paid for the map. But it must be done. I cannot wait to see it on my wall.

My personal framing expert is beyond helpful, but she is not a miracle worker. And the final product will be ready on 7 December.